There are a few things I've come to realize as my marriage was/is falling apart.

1. It doesn't matter who sweeps the floor.
2. Having alone time doesn't mean we don't love one another or that we even want time away from the other.
3. I need to work on:
    A) being more trustful.  He's not given me a reason not to trust him, and he shouldn't have to suffer because I have trust issues.
    B) not being so negative. My kids and Steven do many positive things and have many positive qualities. I need to acknowledge those things more.
    C) I need to approach conversations better, not take everything as a personal attack,  take some time and slow down before responding.
    D) take Steven's feelings into account.
    E) not nitpicking.
    F) expressing my love for Steven more effectively.     G) not throwing things back in his face. I need to forgive and move on.
    H) not lose my shit over petty and minute things.

This will all be a copious amount of work, but I am going to do my best. I know I can do better.
I just hope Steven will give me a chance.
I've been shitty and selfish.
He deserves better than that.  So I'm going to do better.


Ideas thus far:

Make a list of things every day of things I love and appreciate about steven.

2 nights a week where he can play his games, have some personal time, and not get upset about it.

Have a date night once a week.  Dates don't have to be expensive or even going out to do things.

Stay off the laptop and my phone.

We can sit and read together.
Play board/card games together.
Watch a movie or a show with some popcorn.


Do a chore chart.  We've previously discussed this and it was a good idea.